Every individual is made up of different parts that make a whole. Let’s compare this thought to the efficient operation of an appliance. If it begins to not do something as well as before or when it breaks down, we then begin to look at the individual parts to see where the problem is. Our children are made up of physical, emotional, spiritual, intellectual and social components that make them whole.
The engine is their spiritual component which is their belief system based on a knowledge of God. When all components are being fed and are at their best, they thrive. If they are sick, we take them to the doctor to make them better, tending to their physical needs. Their spiritual need is to learn of God and His Word. We take them to church, teach them Bible, and walk alongside them as they navigate life to help them grow spiritually. We also teach them about morality and character on a Spiritual level. It is here where they learn a healthy and reverent “fear of God”.
“Your hands have made me and fashioned me; Give me understanding, that I may learn Your commandments.”
Psalm 119:73 (NKJV)
For their intellect, we see that they are educated. This is an ongoing effort for them to learn and to grow in knowledge that they may be able to put a roof over their heads and food on their tables when they are adults. On the social level, we encourage them to choose the right friends and the right events, so that they can grow and learn. Emotions are the result of their feelings. We make “emotional” deposits when we express our love for them and invest in their lives.
Feelings are the shallowest part of our being. It is critical that we help our children recognize that feelings are often skewed and we should not act upon them. They often do not tell the Truth. If I “feel” unloved, it doesn’t mean that I am “unloved”. If I feel stupid because of one test result, these feelings do not speak truth. God, the perfect parent, even took the time to express His love and His pleasure in His Son, the perfect Son. Matthew 3:17 (NKJV): “And suddenly a voice came from heaven, saying, ‘This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.'”
When have you expressed your appreciation for their choices and decisions? Unfortunately, we can get so caught up in seeing their faults and failures that we miss God-given opportunities to see the good in them. I am not referring to fake compliments; but rather the genuine expression of love, care and concern that every child needs from their parent. I am referring to a day-in and day-out connection where we know their tests, their challenges, their hurt feelings, and their accomplishments. They need us to connect to their lives.
There is an old saying “show me your friends and I’ll show you your future”. Who do your children acclimate to in the social scene? Home should be the safe haven for our children where they are surrounded by people they know without a doubt love and care about them.
