“Aiding and abetting is a legal doctrine related to the guilt of someone who aids or abets another person in the commission of a crime.” It gives us a picture of someone who positions themselves on the wrong side of right and wrong. In our role as parents, we must always assess our approach to any situations that involve our children and ask ourselves “what needs to be learned here?” We must step back and “objectively” judge the situation in order to consider our best contribution.
Sometimes we just need to help our children navigate life with difficult people. They will never grow if we always fix their environment as opposed to helping them consider their response. Our children will avoid many negative experiences with others if they generally treat them with respect and kindness. We must “choose” our battles.
One of the prevalent mindsets of our contemporary culture is that we are all “know it all’s”. We know how to be president, preacher, pastor, parent, doctor, teacher, and weatherman, among other things. The reality is, however, that unless we are in the place of actually being one of these, we really do not know what is best or required for the best outcome. We cannot in reality put ourselves in a place we have never been. Our attitude of “I know best how you should do your job” is a source of conflict and is an obstacle to harmony in our relationships. Often, our children pay the price for this disunity.
Arrogance is defined as “an attitude of superiority manifested in an overbearing manner or in presumptuous claims or assumptions.” Arrogance can cause us to be very “wrong,” and behave as though we are very “right.” Arrogance may entitle us to intimidate others and assume wrongly they are not doing their best. Arrogance can make us totally wrong about a situation or setting involving our children and they pay the ultimate price by learning bad attitudes and behaviors from us.
“Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!”
Romans 12:16 (NLT)
Do I use intimidation and murmuring to cast doubt on others? We are much better off when we come alongside others and consider their feelings and offer help and not criticism. Psalm 133:1-3 (NLT): “How wonderful and pleasant it is when brothers live together in harmony!”
Most important, is my behavior first and foremost pleasing to the Lord? Proverbs 6:16-19 (NLT): “There are six things the LORD hates— no, seven things he detests: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that kill the innocent, a heart that plots evil, feet that race to do wrong, a false witness who pours out lies, a person who sows discord in a family.”
There is an appropriate way to approach others with humble and honest concerns. A “working together” attitude creates the best outcome. 1 Corinthians 3:8 (NLT): “The one who plants and the one who waters work together with the same purpose. And both will be rewarded for their own hard work.”
