What ever happened to teaching our children manners? Did we get too busy or distracted? Did we let other influences wreak havoc on their sense of right and wrong? Kindness and manners are the essentials of a decent society. They are an appropriate behavior that will produce good for our children and for those who they meet.
Appropriate behavior draws no criticism. Manners are the standard for how to treat those we encounter but may not really be acquainted. They are words and actions used properly and at the right time. There is an appropriate tone and body language to be used. There are appropriate words to be used, like thank you, yes ma’am, yes sir, etc. There are appropriate actions such as opening the door for others and offering smiles and pleasantries to strangers.
There was a recent story in the news of a football coach who instructed his team to go door to door and shovel snow for their neighbors. The testimony of the teens was that it “felt so good” to be kind to someone else expecting nothing in return. I recently read that 74 percent of Americans believe that manners and civil behavior have deteriorated in the United States over the past decade. That same reading declared that a quarter of Americans use extremely crude profanity daily.
Proverbs 22:6: “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Have we as parents stopped training in manners and kindness? We aren’t born with that knowledge. Our children either “catch it” from others or are “taught it” by their parents. Do we ever stop and listen to what others have to say about our children’s behavior when we are not around? How do they treat other adults in their lives?
The Bible has a “kindness” message throughout. Look at what Luke wrote about Jesus and His testimony:
“Everyone spoke well of Him and was amazed by the gracious words that came from His lips. “How can this be?” they asked. “Isn’t this Joseph’s son?”
Luke 4:22
This is a wonderful goal — to have others say of our children that they are amazed at their gracious words. A serious conflict with kindness is anger and bitterness. Do we challenge our children to be more pleasant and easy with whom to get along? Ephesians 4:29: “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”
Family relationships are a good training ground for manners and kindness. Charles Spurgeon said, “No matter what good truths you have to teach, no one will thank you if you do not speak kindly.” That can go both ways in that others are more determined to aide and help us when we are kind. Being kind draws the favor of those that we need.
Proverbs 18:21: “The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.” May the consequences of our words and the words of our children reap more kindness and pleasantries
